Best Controversy of The Year
Malaysia has done it again with the “Malaysia Boleh” spirit by becoming the world’s center of attraction through the release of the best controversy script of the year it’s getting more and more interesting day after day and there is no ending yet to date worth multi billion RM of investment from Bollywood and Hollywood.
Being a Malaysian, I’m very excited and proud to summarize the plot but have to do it with maximum caution, if not I’ll be considered as one of those “overwhelming parties promoting Malaysia internationally” and charged under the Sedition Act 1948, the Internal Security Act 1960 and the Universities and University Colleges Act 1971. How thoughtful of the government to protect their people from external harm.
Everyone out there, kindly remind me if I have left out some essence. OK, script writers, actors and directors, without further ado, let the party begin:
Prelude
- VK Lingam Incident
- Altantuya C4 murder case
Main Plot Summary
- 308 political tsunami, the BN coalition lost control over 5 states (Penang, Kedah, Kelantan, Perak and Selangor) and 1 Federal Territory (Kuala Lumpur) to the opposition PR (PKR-DAP-PAS).
- Ex Deputy Prime Minister Dato Seri Anwar Ibrahim (PR de-Facto Leader) announced that PR will eventually replace the BN majority by converting those BN parliament representatives to PR’s position by September 16 2008.
- Chief Editor of Malaysia Today, Raja Petra Kamaruddin was detained under the Sedition Act 1948 with his article entitled “Let’s Send Altantuya’s Murderer to Hell”.
- Mnistry of Tourism terminated MoU with Opposition-ruled states.
- Ex Prime Minister Tun Dr. Mahathir Mohamad resigned from UMNO and urged other members to follow suit as a way of pressuring current Prime Minister Dato Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi to step down.
- Fuel Price Hike. Petrol rose RM0.78 per liter (40.6%) , diesel rose RM1.00 per liter (63.3%).
- Electricity Bill Hike. Residential unit price rose 18%, Commercial unit price rose 26%.
- Entertainment allowance for all ministers and deputy ministers reduced 10%.
- President of Sabah Progressive Party, Dato Yong Teck Lee proposed to table vote of no confidence against the prime minister.
- Chief Editor of Malaysia Today, Raja Petra Kamaruddin revealed in his Statutory Declaration that Deputy Prime Minister’s wife Datin Seri Rosmah Mansor, C4 specialist Acting Colonel Aziz Buyong and his wife Norhayati were at the crime scene when Altantuya Shaariibuu was killed on the spot.
- Members of the media boycotted all press conferences after recieving notice that they were barred from the parliament lobby.
- 23 year old Mohd Saiful Bukhari Azlan accused 60 year old Dato Seri Anwar Ibrahim of sodomy.
- Dato Seri Anwar Ibrahim claimed that Anwar Ibrahim announced that he had recently gathered evidence implicating Inspector General of Police Musa Hassan and Attorney General Abdul Gani Patail of misconduct and fabricating evidence against him.
- Private Investigator Balasubramaniam a/l Perumal filed a Statutory Declaration revealing untold stories regarding the relationship between the deputy prime minister Dato Seri Najib Tun Razak, Altantuya Shaariibuu and deputy prime minister’s ex political analyst Abdul Razak Baginda.
- Within 24 hours Balasubramaniam retracted all contents in his first Statutory Declaration, withdrawing all statements related to the deputy prime minister.
- Inspector General of Police Musa Hassan stated that there is a possibility that military forces will be introduced should the need to control the protesting crowd arise.
- All trading activities were suspended for one day as Bursa Malaysia was shut down due to some technical difficulties.
- Balasubramaniam a/l Perumal and his family were reported missing without any trace.
- A major fuel hike protest was being held at Kelana Jaya stadium (going to happen in less than 9 hours).
- ???
- ???
- …
Judging from the unpredicatablity of the subsequent plots, it is confirmed that a huge production team is needed to film the entire masterpiece.
Oh ya, we need A LOT of “keh-leh-feh”s to act as the public who suffered from everything since the beginning of the turmoil. Who wants to be part of this?
WHAT IS HAPPENING TO THIS COUNTRY?!
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SEX AND THE C4
Sodomy is a useful word
recently said and heard,
in Malaysian homes and offices
it’s all about famous orifices.
What is going on, you wonder
when Bala steals the thunder,
finger pointing the magic word
to the delight of a horny herd
Organs united, names forgotten?
VIPs are really rotten
Saifool he knows and did not know
doubts about Aminah begin to grow
of whose loose lips he was afraid
but liked her other end instead;
of course he knew it wasn’t right
but it felt so good and tight!
You could not hump like Greeks
the Hindenburg’s fat cheeks;
what her hubby found so succulent
was making Rosmah trucculent.
And so she thought, the time was due
for a nice Mongolian barbecue.
Enter the analyst, not so anal,
who found the girl too banal;
fearing supernatural harm
from her juicy feminine charm,
he hired Bala straightaway
to keep the honeytrap at bay
but private dicks were of no match
for Aminah’s superlative snatch
and now that Najib had had his fill,
he would not share the till;
right after the submarine deal,
Aminah’s fate he would seal.
Now Rosmah had one idea
on how to kenakan dia
“Let’s bomb the bombshell,
let’s send her to hell.”
Thus perished the hapless beauty
after translation and booty duty;
now Rosmah’s ass was happy
until one blogger got yappy;
this Hindenburg nearly caught fire
yet to sue she has no desire.
But Najib’s part in this murder
will travel much further;
despite his media actions
and one or two retractions,
some questions will remain
a big part of his bane–
how did Altantuya really die?
and why did he have to lie?
Did he pay off Bala savvily,
or threaten to C4 his family?
What acts could be more despised?
With his money, we’re not surprised;
after all, he’s such a bully beast,
to him and him alone, at least,
magic words that cannot apply–
are useful for making rivals die.
see what will happen next